2391 marijuana cont'd-- I watched him carefully, while I set dinner on the table. He was looking the photos I had mounted on the wall; Family, Friends, Places I'd been, and some autographed photos of mom's friends. I grasped his hand and asked him simply if he was hungry.

We ate, and though I doubted he'd use it I handed him his own key to my new apartment, I admitted to him that I didn't think he'd be likely to use it much, but if he wanted to, he would at least know that he was welcome. I secretly hoped that I wasn't falling in love with him; I also hoped that if I was, that I wasn't the only one. I'd had plenty of that already with Giran. I thought about it, and came to the realization that the only other man I had continued to sleep with while I was with Giran had been Eagle. Things were getting too serious. I asked Eagle if he wanted me to take him home, since I had done what I had brought him here for. Eagle didn't know what was going on in my head (I hoped), but I didn't know what he was thinking either.
I had been right. Mother hadn't been the one to make me feel like a child, I had done it myself. I looked down at my plate, stood and put the dirty dishes in the sink. Let me take you home Eagle, I'm not feeling so much like company as when I brought you here, and you'll want your own bed to sleep in. I wouldn't let him kiss me, he hadn't done anything wrong; I just want-I don't know what I want Eagle.